I could see from where I was seated a few of my women friends wiping tears from their eyes as they listened to Elder Holland. I was crying as well and my handkerchief was already wet. A young couple seated in front of us was huddled very closely, his arms resting gently on her shoulders. I loved what I saw. In my mind I wished many of the couples in that dimly lit room were seated just like them, comfortable and close and loving what they are hearing.
It was a beautiful evening and we were in a Devotional for Married Couples. Inside the dimly lit hall, couples sat side by side and listened intently to counsels on how to make marriages work. Elder and Sister Schmutz were a sight to behold. They are a beautiful couple – President, a handsome man and Sister Cindy, an elegant and beautiful woman. I could see how much they love each other. As I looked at them and listened to them take turns telling all of us about their own challenges early on in their marriage, what struck me most was the truth that as long as both husband and wife are willing to work on their marriage relationship, the Lord will bless the union. I saw how President Schmutz loves and respects his wife, and I saw too how Sis Cindy looked at President Schmutz. It was evident how much she loves and respects her husband in return. I especially loved hearing President Schmutz call Sister Cindy “Honey”. Indeed Elder Holland was right in his observation – they both looked like teenagers still deeply in love with each other and having fun together after 41 years of being married (and still counting). I love them both and grateful for their very inspiring example of true love. That evening we all learned the importance of regular temple attendance and making room for the Lord in our lives especially when we feel we can’t or when we think we don’t have enough time. We learned about the inspired counsel of their Bishop – something that they did not think they needed which resulted to their Saturday 4 pm date.
When Elder Holland stood up and started his talk I sensed that he felt something was missing. True enough, he said he missed his wife especially after watching the Schmutz’s, and so he showed us the picture of his wife on his iPad’s screensaver. What he said about her was truly very touching. He said “she is not only my screensaver, she is my lifesaver.” Later I was told by my children that Elder Holland always have his loving wife beside him when he gave talks in BYU, especially on topics about marriage, family, and love.
Elder Holland taught us that night many things, especially ways to strengthen our marriages so that our lives on this earth will be a bit of heaven. But there was one thing that really, really left an indelible mark in my mind and my heart, one that I promise to always remember. He counseled the wives to always remember what all husbands need from their wives – to feel that they are accepted for who they are. When I heard this, I silently asked myself if I have done my part to make my husband feel that I love him for who he is. Have I, at any point in our married life, made him feel unaccepted, unwanted, unappreciated? I looked at him intently listening to Elder Holland. Slowly I reached for his right hand, placed my left arm around his shoulder, kissed him near his neck (he’s taller than me so his cheeks was way too high for me to reach), and whispered to him how much I love him. He looked at me for a few seconds, squeezed my hand resting gently on his, and smiled.
I am grateful for that Married Couples Devotional. I am grateful for the counsels given that night by inspired leaders of the Church. I am grateful for their examples. What they counseled us they lived and applied in their own marriages, and they have been blessed. And they want the same blessings for all of us who are willing to listen and follow them.
When we listen to our leaders when they give talks, we are are constantly and gently counseled to listen closely to that unique message that’s meant for us personally. That night the messages I received were very clear, and I am grateful.
How about you? What message did you receive?
(Photos Used with Permission)
just the way i am ... 