Growing Up and Growing Apart …

I wish I grew up with my sisters Chary and Carla … Oh yes I grew up with them alright, but not for long. At seventeen I left them and from then on, I only got to see them on holidays and vacations.

Siblings … they are our blood relations. We come from one set of parents. We grow up together and share almost everything – from clothes to food to bedrooms and toys … and dreams. Then we slowly mature in years, begin to widen our horizon and find new interests … develop new friends. In time we fall in love and then we marry. We then leave home and leave behind our parents and our brothers and sisters.

I can not turn back the time, and I can not undo what has been done. I have no regrets about marrying young. My regret is more on my inability to continue bonding with my two sisters even if I was married. I realize now that time and distance is not enough an excuse for the things I failed to do. And so until now I still cry thinking about what could have been’s … how life would have been different had I spent more time with them while we were growing up … But there are just things in life I have to live with … and let go …

I am always grateful though that behind the heartaches, pains, regrets, and longings, are learning experiences that I want to teach my children … so they will not make the same mistakes I did. So they will be spared from the pains and anguish I go through … when I think about the things I missed.

I am a Mother to five amazing children, and I am grateful that I am given the chance to be an active participant in their rearing and nurturing. I am grateful that I have developed this consciousness of how important my role is as a Mother. I am now witnessing how my own children are growing up together not only as siblings but as best of friends. They are different in more ways than I can imagine, but in so many ways they are alike. Each one is unique, each one with his or her own weaknesses and strengths, but they are all one – they all came from me and I, together with my sweetheart, are raising them the best way we know how.

It is my prayer that when time comes that they start to have their own families, they will always think of home … our home.  I want them to know that our home will always be theirs.

I want them to know that me, Mommy, and their Daddy will always be there for them … no matter what.

I want them to always remember each of their positive traits:

Ate Myco, for her generosity. I want them to follow her example of what it means to be responsible and loving.

I want them to remember their Ate Ella, her awesome sense of humor that peaks when the clock strikes 9 o’clock. How she makes all of us laugh …

I want them to remember Ann Ann, her dance moves and how she has been a great help in making sure that we all have nice-smelling clothes every single day.

I want them to remember Mymy and her eagerness and diligence in trying to come up with delicious recipes for all of us to feast on.

And I want them to always remember Tonton, our youngest … his art works and how messy his room is because he has converted it into an art studio.

I want them to always remember that they should not allow anything or anyone to tear them apart, as long as they stand for what is right. When troubles come, as they naturally will, they should know that they can count on each other.

I know this to be true … brothers and sisters will always be brothers and sisters. Blood will always be thicker than water. Through thick and thin, siblings should be there for each other. Friends will leave you, husbands and wives will leave you for any one reason. But your brothers and sister, your blood relations, no matter what you do, will always be your family.

I love my two sisters Chary and Carla. I hope they know that I love them so much. If I can turn back time I’d spend days and days with them playing and dreaming and growing up together. I’d share what I have and hope that whatever we’ve had during our younger years will see us through as we grow old together. I wish for them to be happy …  that’s all that matters to me. Until now I wish I were a better Ate to them … I may not be with them physically, but they are always in my prayers every night before I go to bed. Love you Char and Carl, with all my heart.

My daughter who is also a blogger has often commented that my blog is too personal. Well it is, because this is precisely why I came up with this blog … to share to everyone what’s important to me … in the hope that I can be of help in bringing about consciousness of the things that are of great value … the things that matters most in this life … family and love!

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2 thoughts on “Growing Up and Growing Apart …”

  1. Dear Tina,
    Your blog is beautiful. Its the differences that make our family much more colorful. And we are blends of our parents.
    Thank you for writing down what is in my heart. Exchange names and its true for me. Growing up and flying free is part of the growth but its the family ties that keep us strong in our journey. A beautiful personal blog indeed.

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