“If I Can Turn Back Time, What Would I Do Differently?”

My Kids

Is it the hormones again? Or maybe I’m really getting old (I hope not so fast though) … because old pictures are making me cry …

Of all the many realizations I’ve had, the most striking is this: that time flies so fast! I can not imagine how it all happened … like what happened in between all those years when my children were still wearing diapers and were still sleeping with us and now? How did they grow up so fast? It used to be that when we went to the only Jollibbee store in Cagayan de Oro, we’d just just buy a meal or two and share everything and still have left-overs? Now, they pick what they want, and when budget allows, they want the biggest and the yummiest …

It used to be that we fit perfectly in our small car … first the green “bettle”; then Dadi’s yellow “Bumblebee”; then we had “PeNoy” … no no no, not the president – our green and mighty”PeNoy” … then we had “Multi” … then “Bishi” and now “Cindee”.  However, bisan pa tingali Hiace Super Grandia, we would not fit anymore !

When they were younger, ako ra putol sa ilang buhok! Karon, nah, dili na mosugot sa akong old parlor kay dili daw kabalo (which I also agree – morag basta lang) … they prefer to go to Ystilo, Vanity Works, Salon de Rose, or David’s … Now they’re all grown up … and they’re still growing up fast!

My hubby and I, on our early morning or late evening chitchats, we talk about what will happen when they finally tell us they’re ready to settle down. Many times we joked about what we will do and how we will respond … but then in reality its something we still don’t want to happen just yet … Maybe in 10 years … or 20? Hahahaha! We know it will come, and so we’re making sure the gun is fully loaded and the blades are all sharp and shiny (lol)!

Then these words enter my mind …

If only ….

Someone has written that these two are the saddest words a person can utter. In a way, yes, there’s truth to it. But I prefer to look at it differently. I’m going to write about my “if only’s” so that my children will know how much I love them; so that they will know that if I missed doing things with them when they were younger – that it was not intentional. I also want them to learn from my short comings (I believe they are not really mistakes because I never knew then what I was supposed to do); so that when they become mothers themselves (and Father for Romelson), they can look back and say … “Momi taught me that …”

So here goes my: “If I can turn back time, what would I do differently?”

I’d breastfeed all of them all the way …

I will be a full-time stay-home-Mom …

I’ll teach them to sing and dance …

I’ll ask their Dad to make/construct them a small bamboo “balay balay” … Kanang dunay sala and bedroom and tiny kitchen hahaha! I know their Dad will say yes! (on second thought, pwede pa man ko mag ask karon hahaha!)

Then we’ll play house together …

I’ll talk to them about my childhood …

I’ll let them spend long vacations in my childhood home with their Lolo and Lola …

I’d let them play with their cousins Eda and Nico until such time sila nay mo surrender sa kakapoy hahaha!

I’ll say yes every time they ask if “pwede maligo sa ulan”(unless dunay thunderstorms and lightning hahaha!)…

I’ll hug them more and kiss them more, hangtod they become mothers and fathers themselves …

I’ll tell them that they can talk to me about anything …

I’ll read the scriptures with them regularly …

We’ll learn to bake together …

I’ll let them paint a wall with their hands and feet …

We’ll go hiking and trekking somewhere in the mountains and hills of Malaybalay …

I’ll teach them to sing “Bukidnon My Home” …

We’ll play Chinese garter, “Iring Iring”,  “tumba lata”, “tago tago”, “Bulan Bulan”, “reskate”, “takyan” og uban pa!

We’ll go biking during early mornings …

We’ll swim in rivers and streams …

Magpalupad mi og tabanog basta summer

We’ll try all the flavors of  ice cream and then brush our teeth together …

We’ll go to the beach regularly and we’ll make sandcastles …

We’ll watch sunrises and sunsets together …

We’ll show them how to make Gumamela bubbles and how to use papaya stalks to blow bubbles …

I’ll show them where we used to play sa Valley sa BSC … asa mi ga patiluros sa una sa gagmay pa mi gamit kanang plastic container sa gasolina … 

(I’m now realizing this list can actually go on and on and on … )

I just hope and pray that my children know how much I love them … and how much I want them to be happy … and how much it will mean to me that they do their best in everything.  I hope I have raised them to be good and responsible individuals. I hope when they become parents themselves, they will be the much “better me” …

image

You are my greatest treasures in my life … you are my reason for waking up in the morning and my inspiration in my work … because of you I am trying to become better … ♥♥♥

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s